First step is the hardest

I hate photos of myself. I don't hate myself, just photos. Some would argue that it means I hate myself, but I disagree. I'm really ok with who I am, have a fairly intact self-esteem, its just photos of me that seem foreign. I never thought I'd be heavy. I come from a long line of naturally fit and thin women. Most of my adult life I never had to think about my weight. It never fluctuated more than 10 pounds in any direction. As recently as 13 years ago my mother was concerned that I was "too thin".


And yet, here I am today at 213 pounds on my 5'7" frame. A far cry from "too thin" and definitely not where I want to be. Hard to even type the number and see it on the screen.





I've spent a decade declaring that my weight is because of my thyroid disease. Certainly my thyroid (lack thereof actually) contributes to changes in my metabolism, but if I am going to be real here I have to confess that my weight is due to overeating and underactivity.






I'm stepping out here today because I want to change. It is not just about losing weight. It is about losing the hold food has on me and gaining the motivation to increase my activity. It is about proving to myself and others that I can overcome anything - through Christ and His love for me. I cannot do it without Him, for I can do nothing without Jesus. He is my strength. All glory goes to Him.


God's word says: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me". I know those words are true, and yet I am living in defeat over weight gain - living as though I don't really believe it. I feel God calling me to live out those words, to draw on His strength to overcome. This blog is about making the decision to find that strength, to live out His word and to allow Him to transform my life.


Will you join me on this journey?